Feeling a little blue

The past little while I have been feeling rather down and (dare I say it?) depressed. I stopped taking Celexa a while back (which had helped stabilize my mood at the time) and now I am only on Gabapentin. I'm wondering if our crazy Toronto weather this fall is a contributing factor to my gloominess.

I have also been taking some green tea pills for the past month or so to help with the weight I gained while trying all sorts of antidepressants. I gained about 40 pounds while I was taking Effexor (about a year ago) and I haven't been able to lose any of the weight. So I bought some green tea pills from the Carrot Common's Dispensary store with the hopes that it will help speed up my metabolism and give me more energy as it states on the bottle.

So far I still haven't lost any weight or gained any more energy. Although I have been having a lot of trouble sleeping the past couple of weeks. Not sure if it's because there's alot on my mind or if it's the extra caffeine in the green tea pills (I do take them in the morning and at lunch so the caffeine shouldn't be effecting me at 11:00 p.m. when I try to sleep, right?).

Anyways, I feel like lately I have been experiencing a bit more anxiety than usual, and considering the fact that I was feeling so much better on the Gabapentin I'm a bit concerned because things were starting to really move forward to me and I really, really don't want to take any more steps back. Things are going pretty well for me and I want to keep up that momentum. Any suggestions?

Anyways, I hope you have a very Happy Thanksgiving this weekend! Take it easy and eat lots and lots of turkey!

God in my life

I was born and raised Roman Catholic but I've never been overly religious or a very devout Christian. Until more recently. In battling my anxiety disorder I have become so much closer to God and my relationship with Him has developed a lot more. I find that I look to Him more often for guidance and strength. And I have to be honest, I think that my faith has been the one thing that has kept me going many times. For those of you who know what it's like to battle anxiety disorders on a daily basis, you can understand how hard it is to get motivated and hell, even get out of bed sometimes. I feel that God in my life has been a force and inspiration on many occasions where I needed help. Has anyone else experienced this or felt that God has helped them through hard times?

Prayer is a wonderful thing and I pray a lot that I will beat this thing one day. I have also started doing some research and listening to Christian music and have actually found some enjoyable artists. I would consider them to be more contemporary Christian or almost a pop music kind of feel. Anyways, if you're interested, check them out. I should note that so far I have only looked into female vocalists. I will get to the males eventually...I needed a starting point. And please send me your suggestions if you have any great artists you enjoy listening to when you need some inspiration or relaxation. I would love to hear from you!

Here are my newfound (female) artists:

Amanda Falk
Bethany Dillon
Jaci Valasquez
Joy Williams
Kristy Starling
Mandisa
Natalie Grant
Nichole Nordeman
Rachael Lampa
Rebecca St. James

Enjoy! :-)